Wednesday, July 12, 2006

Dear Girl In The Office Next Door:

I understand you work in an office full of Italian Pygmy Men and that general standards of existence in your office are probably quite low, but that does not make it OK to blow dry your hair in the public restroom of our office building. That being said, giving your bangs a trim prior to blowing it dry can also be considered a corporate faux pas.

Consider this a friendly "heads-up" on my behalf. Because publicly condemning you and/or stoning you to death is generally considered "too severe" a penalty these days for stupidity and I read in a pamphlet entitled "Accepting Differences In People" that not all trailer parks are dirty and full of toothless, fat Southerners on Public Assistance.

So I guess my point is...take the fucking tax dollars I contribute to your monthly stipend and go to a god damned salon so I don't have to look at your filthy hair clinging to the side of the sink you fat hick.

Respectfully,
-Min

3 comments:

Puffins said...

Is there any way you can put some Nair-esque liquid in products she uses?

Might be fun.

Min said...

Might also eliminate her poor grooming habits.

Puffins said...

Good point good point. Latent desire to eliminate her too?