Jessica Simpson, a woman whom I imagine can barely walk and think at the same time, took time out of her busy schedule of eating fried chicken and mashed potatoes with extra gravy to roll down the catwalk at the Ozlem Suer show in Paris. They say black is very slimming. But there's just so much a ruffled, black satin wreath hung round one's Elvira-like coif can do to suck attention away from armpit rolls.
Friday, September 04, 2009
Bride of Frankenstein
Jessica Simpson, a woman whom I imagine can barely walk and think at the same time, took time out of her busy schedule of eating fried chicken and mashed potatoes with extra gravy to roll down the catwalk at the Ozlem Suer show in Paris. They say black is very slimming. But there's just so much a ruffled, black satin wreath hung round one's Elvira-like coif can do to suck attention away from armpit rolls.
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3 comments:
I thought to be nice and call her Rubenesque.
Then I realized where I was, and realized that Bunyanesque is more accurate.
You know, I was fighting the urge to be nice, too. See how Japan screwed with me?
The thing is, she's not fat at all. Girl just doesn't know how to dress. That, and I think the people surrounding her want her to fail.
Right, she's not fat at all, just poorly wrapped.
Still. That should be enough to keep ripping her.
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